Goals

I know everyone and their mother is posting New Years Resolutions right now. I can't even remember what I wrote about last year, sad to say, huh? (I'll probably go check that out after I post this for curiosity sake). A couple nights ago I wrote several goals down for the new year. I wont say that they are resolutions so much as just goals. Goals seem like a nicer word. Something you hope to accomplish. A resolution sounds like a must. It's something you're going to do. Well, I know myself well enough that most resolutions wont be kept. So... here are some goals I made for this new year.

1. Deliver a healthy full term baby. Definitely the first goal for the year-- however it's something I have no say over. I can do my best to give my baby the best odds: eating health(ier) choices, taking my vitamin regularly, getting enough rest, etc... but I'm not in charge of the rest.

2. Fit into the beautiful dress already purchased for my sister's wedding in June. (Just for anyone interested in the math, there is 14 weeks between the due date and the wedding date).

3. Somehow manage to accomplish singing AT that wedding.

4. Keep track of all grocery spending in excel to see percentages. (which means I still need to enter December's receipts)

5. coupon, coupon, coupon. My goal for the year is to build a 3-6 month supply of food storage in addition to stockpiling items used regularly. My first goal is grains: a 6 month supply for four people is 600 pounds of grain. (a site I have been collecting info about food storing on says you need 300 pounds of grain per person for a year worth supply, this is to provide a 2200 calorie diet) Grains include Wheat, Rice, Rolled Oats, Dried Corn, Popcorn, Flour, Pasta Products, Dried Potatoes, Quinoa, Amaranth, Spelt, Buckwheat, etc. ((psst... I don't even know what quinoa, amaranth or spelt is.)) My plain is rice, popcorn (kernels of course), dried potatoes, flour and pasta. I've been slowly adding rice packets to my cart when they are 10 for 10 and I have coupons of course, so I'll need to tally up what I have and what we need... it's really really overwhelming to look at the list of what you need for a WHOLE year for all the food items. OMG it's nuts. But I'm not going gung-ho-full-speed-ahead-nuts version. I'm planning a very slow and steady attempt to do this. Because I do believe the Bible 100%, I do believe that the end times could be upon us, are very near, and might happen in my lifetime. If they do, I'm hoping I'll be able to provide for my family when our money fails us all. Even if I don't see that happen, I can prepare for a drought in our family if Jamie were to ever (God forbid) lose his job and we'd have no income. Wont it be amazing to go to the storage room for dinner instead of the credit cards?

I derailed of course...

6. The plan for goal #2 (and beyond the wedding) is to rejoin weight watchers and work it. work it. No quitting. No excuses. Goal from restart date will be 75 pounds in 52 weeks. I did it once. I can do it again. I will do it again. I can not chase after two kids well this size, with these back problems and strain on my body--- so there is no way I can chase after three. I will find a better me in 2011. A healthier one. A version where my back isn't constantly aching and I can walk/run/chase my kiddos without being out of breath or in pain.

7. Walk. Up the walking. I can start this as soon as it's warmer, baby come yet or not. I must start walking. I need to be walking. I shouldn't be neglecting the park just next door. It's time to use it. This is the year for using the park. After the baby comes and we see where we all are health wise, I plan on making some serious exercise goals.

8. Read the Word more. Lots more. Get in it and stay in it. Goal to read--at least-- a proverb every day. I've attempted this before and it's always stopped somewhere along the way in the first month even. From today forward-- one proverb every day. Preferably in the morning to start my day "right" and hopefully set the tone for the day. I need to remember the words in Matthew (I think) that what comes out of my mouth is a reflection of what's in my heart. I want the words of my mouth each day to be nice and kind and loving and patient and honorable. That means that my heart has to be full of the word and not of the world.

9. Read 6 Jane Austin books this year. Also read at least 6 "raising boys" or Christian parenting help books. I'm currently in the middle of one called Scream Free Parenting. It's kicking my butt badly. I have a feeling I'm going to restart it once I finish it. While I don't agree with everything that is said by the author, I am convicted of a lot and have been working greatly on my REACTIONS to my childrens' behaviors/attitudes/decisions. The next one I want to get is called Grace-Based Parenting. It's referred to in Scream Free Parenting and I'd like to check it out. I'm also partway through reading The Power of a Praying Parent. I haven't picked it up in a long while and want to continue it and also maybe start it over as well. (That makes 3 of my 6 in that category... just have to actually read them).

10. I want to give every real and honest effort (insurance willing) to continue OT even with the baby coming and throwing monkey wrenches in our schedules. Matthew needs it. I need it. We as a family need it. We've seen great progress, we just still have so so far to go. I'm anxious to think about having the energy and ability to devote the attention he needs to his issues after a baby comes (crying) into our world. But I MUST commit. We have charts and stickers and his own eating calendar now. We have motivation from his therapist Jennifer to keep going. We have encouragement from family and friends that we lean on when it gets hard. And I've had it pointed out to me that God already knew Matthew's issues before he was born. God placed Matthew --with his OT needs-- in our family, in our care, under Jamie and my parenting because it was exactly where God wants him to be. God is and will continue to equip us to handle all that comes. There are times when I feel like "I can't do this anymore!" and days when I do need to tag team some help to take charge when I'm emotionally drained but, this is exactly where Matthew needs to be and God is already in complete control... And DEVIL BE WARNED, WE WILL OVERCOME BECAUSE WE ARE OVERCOMERS. My main goal in this area is to not let the Devil get me down. To not let the Devil push me around. He can't have my family dinner time as his stomping ground and play pen anymore. This is a sacred time that our family has been yearning for that Jamie and I long to no longer dread each day and it stops here. We are making headway, we will continue making headway and we will be at peace at the table with the help of Christ Jesus! .... over the weekend, we were eating dinner one night. I forget which night. And Jamie cracked a joke. I can't even remember what the joke was about. But it was awesome. We were all eating happily. We were laughing. We were loving each other. These are the things that is in store for my family and my dinner table this year. No more screaming. No more fussing. No more short order cook. We will eat dinner as a family in peace and have a loving joyful time in 2011. 2010's way of life at our table is over. And I'm so grateful for Jennifer helping Matthew overcome his issues, helping me overcome my own so that we can all enjoy each other. In September I committed to doing whatever Jennifer said for a year. And there will be hard days to come, certainly. (even last night was one) but right now I'm only looking up and I plan to keep that commitment best I'm able.

"We've been made more than conquerors. Overcomers in this life. We've been made victorious -- through the blood of Jesus Christ."