Loss continued...

So I think I know the real reason I've been thinking about loss lately... though I didn't want to admit it. Feb is around the corner... At the end of Feb it will be a year since I lost a baby growing inside me. It's so hard to think about. It doesn't ever go away. The wonder of who that little person would have been. I look at Mark and I wouldn't trade him for anything, he was a blessing for sure, something worth waiting for... But, I still will wonder about the little one who didn't make it. The pain doesn't go away. It's lessened greatly, but I guess it wont ever really leave... Anyhow. That's all.